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Sunday, March 20, 2022

Ed Wood anthology covers nearly all the topics of sex, whether you want it or not

 


Review by Doug Gibson


I am a huge Ed Wood fan going on way past 40 years now; ever since the only Wood canon I knew was "Glen Or Glenda" to "Plan 9 From Outer Space," ... and that lost "Night of the Ghouls"/"Revenge of the Dead." (which was soon found). 


But Ed was far more of a writer than a director. His "mainstream" directing career kind of ended with the (wink) semi-adult film, "The Sinister Urge." Then it was a long stint of virtually all adult cinema, soft and hard, for Ed the director.


But he never stopped writing. Dozens of novels and books, hundreds of short stories, lots of "educational" sex books, flotsam and jetsam such as text titles for silent adult shorts, scripts for (usually) soft and hard adult fare. You are noticing a trend here, right?


Wood was a severe alcoholic, who eventually died prematurely from his addiction. The last few years of his life, he was unable to keep a steady job. I recently saw a photo of Ed during those years (early to mid 1970s) in a biography of the late filmmaker Stephen Apostolf, who may have been the last boss to cut Ed a paycheck. Ed's at a party and he looks very drunk and very unhealthy. He looks like someone long used to being looked down upon and ignored. It breaks my heart. I actually had tears looking that photo. The reason? I admire Ed Wood's vivid imagination and prolific writing. I still consider him a pulp Elmore Leonard, writing only a first draft with no real editor. 


I get it. You think I'm nuts. But the first major woman in his life, Dolores Fuller, accurately described him as an "American original." And his now-deceased widow, Kathy, never left the old drunk. Bob Blackburn, who lives in Los Angeles, befriended Kathy Wood in the last era of her life. They developed trust and Blackburn has spent an incredible amount of time finding Ed's shorts stories and non-fiction writings, most published in sleazy, over-priced adult books and magazines, the kind that sprung up after the courts OK'd that stuff.


Bob has helped compile and get published two massive, indispensible collections of Ed's short stories, "Blood Splatters Quickly," from ORBooks, and "Angora Fever: The Collected Stories of Ed Wood."  You can get get the latter from BearManor Media. Some of Ed's novels are still floating around in reprints, which came out mostly in the '90s when Tim Burton's "Ed Wood," that lovely overidealized paean to Ed's early years, was released.


OK, I am finally getting to this review. "When the Topic is Sex, by Ed. Wood Jr." was recently released, also by BearManor Media. (Amazon link here). The "essays" inside are the adult magazine filler material that occupied a few pages in the magazines published by Bernie Bloom's Pendulum Publisher's business. Ed worked there in the '70s until alcoholism made him expendable. He was valued there for his versatility and speed in crafting coherent works (usually) that showed his lifelong wordsmith talents. If you want to read a fascinating account of a youngster at Pendulum working with a talented has-been on the way down (Ed) read Leo Eaton's account here. I think I read it first in another BearManor book on Ed's lost scripts. Pendulum was a sweatshop for wordsmiths. It was a starting point for young writers like Eaton, but a literal end of the road for Ed.


Publisher/writer/poet Bill Shute provides an introduction to "When the Topic is Sex." He notes that Wood was a known and trusted quality in the industry. He could take a subject, prurient or not, and fit in the details. There are more than 80, I imagine, "non-fiction" musings on a wide variety of starter topics (I'll let the reader peruse them). Themes include the evolution of sexual mores in film, contemporary society, education, prostitution, wife swapping, pornography, the various different genres of the sex worker industry, S&M, sweaters, social diseases, sexual dictionaries, fur fetishes. Topics include the possibility of a "sex tax" to balance budgets, the lure of Greenwich Village ... I could go on endlessly listing the topics Ed muses about. Much of it is offensive and misogynistic. It's time capsule mores.


The stories are often sexually graphic but not so much erotic. There's one about a housewife turned leader of a sexual coven of witches. Ed includes himself in the story, but it's of course made up. A lot of the stories involve interviews with students, prostitutes, secretaries, etc. I think Ed was being tongue-in-cheek with these "on-th-street" accounts because as blogger Joe Blevins has already pointed out, these subjects talk like Ed Wood writes! One fun aspect of the essays is the irony of a bloated, alcoholic man around 50 writing "authoritatively" about the sexual hijinks of college students and "still-Mad Menish" office and nightclub/bars environments. Ed likely had a firm grasp on the sexual fantasies of Pendelum's clientile. I imagine his tongue was in his cheek a lot when he was crafting these pieces.


I'm not going to say much about the essays. Frankly, they can be a slog if taken in large doses. Don't read too many in one setting. One or two a day is enough. You can then appreciate Ed's unique writing style. As Shute notes in his introduction, Ed's style always shows up in his art. In these essays his prose takes the form of a pleasant, slightly know-it-all educator letting us know about these "trends in sex." Or if it's a more spicy topic, or perhaps Ed was intoxicated when he wrote the story, the narrator shifts in personality to a more " hmm, take a good hard look at this sexual deviancy ..." I sometimes imagine this Ed Wood would have made a brisk living selling spicy post cards on the streets of Paris 120 years ago. 


One essay I enjoyed in "When the Topic is Sex" is "Sex is Not a Hazard." It's very graphic at times but it also has a sweet undertone to it. Its Ed telling us that sexual compability is an important component of a sexual relationship and couples should explore, and not run away from, what makes both partners happy. I also enjoy the"news of the weird" type compilations of truly bizarre happenings. Since I see these types of columns even today in alternative weeklies, I don't think Ed was telling tall tales in these pieces. The "Mondo" exploitative documentary film from the 60s and 70s was still around when Ed wrote these. I wonder if he saw those films. 


Frankly, I worry talking about these essays might spur Big Brother social media tech discipline on me. ... Despite the made up interviews, Ed does his research when it's needed. I Googled a lot of his sources on topics, and they checked out. Example: when he writes about a sex tax, he cites an obscure New Orleans educator from long ago. Turns out the fellow existed.


Pendulum had archives for research, and an unpublished sex study by a guy named Dr. TK Peters. (He really existed.) But I can still imagine, Ed, in his windowless Pendulum cubicle, thumbing through the Readers Guide to Periodical Literature booklets, taking notes, looking for sources. Heck, I did that a lot of that in the pre-Internet days.


I want to add that the aforementioned blogger Joe Blevins runs the absolutely essential Ed Wood Wednesdays Dead2Rights blog. It's here. Joe provides in-depth recaps of every essay in this book. He also, to the best of his knowledge, tells readers when published and in what publication. Over the course of almost two months, I read every essay in "When the Topic is Sex." The recaps Joe provides really helps in digesting them. (The recaps are also available at Bob Blackburn's Ed Wood Jr. Facebook page.)


To sum up, the book is a history lesson. Besides providing another peek into Ed's life, and his surroundings -- the desperate years -- it's a history lesson into the genre and culture of the working world Ed and others experienced 50 years ago. 


Tuesday, March 1, 2022

Seven Deaths In A Cat's Eye – A Brilliant Combination of Gothic Horror and Italian Giallo



Review by Steve D. Stones


Twilight Time has recently released a beautiful blu-ray disc of the 1973 Italian film – Seven Deaths In A Cat's Eye. Directed by Antonio Margheriti (aka Anthony M. Dawson), the film is also known by its Italian title of La Morte Negli Occhi de Gatto. The brilliance of this film is that it combines elements of the murder mystery Italian “giallo” with Gothic horror.


In an opening sequence that is important to the ending of the film, the viewer sees a close up of a stained glass lamp at a table and then a large chest being thrown down stone stairs of a castle as a corpse rolls out of the chest. A ginger tabby cat at the top of the stairs witnesses this scene. The corpse is eaten by rats as the camera shows close up shots of bloody eaten flesh of the corpse. The lamp will make another appearance at the end of the film, so it's important to remember this scene.



Corringa (Jane Birkin) returns to her family ancestral Scottish castle from her convent school in London after being expelled. The castle is known as Dragonstone. A gorilla looks out a castle window as Corringa's carriage arrives. Corringa's mother Lady Alicia (Dana Ghia) tries to persuade the matriarch of the house – Lady Mary MacGrieff (Francoise Christophe) to sell the castle and come to London where she can get treatment for her insane, anti-social son James (Hiram Keller). James distances himself from the rest of the family by creating art in his castle studio and avoiding contact with anyone. He paints nude portraits of his French teacher Suzanne (Doris Kunstmann) who also lives in the castle.


When Corringa arrives at castle Dragonstone, she is greeted by Suzanne in her bedroom. Corringa decides to burn some of her school books in the fireplace and accidentally throws a Holy Bible into the fire. Suzanne pulls Corringa away from the fire as she tries to pull the bible out of the fireplace. Corringa's mother Alicia fears that the burning of the Bible has brought a curse on the family. The family priest – Father Robertson (Venantino Venantini) assures the family at dinner that nothing bad will happen if burning the Bible was a mistake.


Lord James MacGrieff enters the room to join the family for dinner, but his rude and inhospitable behavior makes members of the family get up and leave the table. The family doctor – Dr. Franz (Anton Diffring) tells father Robertson that James killed his baby sister when he was a child.



Later that night, Lady Alicia is suffocated in her bed with a pillow as the ginger cat witnesses the murder. Dr. Franz is asked by Lady Mary to announce her death as natural causes. James watches from a distance as the coffin of Alicia is carried to the family crypt. The ginger tabby cat jumps on top of the casket as the pallbearers carry her into the crypt. Lady Mary instructs the family chauffeur to lock the cat in the crypt with Alicia's body.


One by one, the MacGrief family members are murdered with a razor blade. Most of the murders take place off camera. This adds to the tension of not knowing who the killer is. The ginger cat is present at the scene of each murder. Even Lord James' pet gorilla is murdered.


After going down in the cellar of the castle to find the ginger tabby cat, Corringa encounters the rotted corpse eaten by rats and her mother's grave empty and is attacked by bats. Lord James later shows Corringa his nude paintings of Suzanne in his studio. She becomes more suspicious of James as the murderer of her mother.


When a police inspector (Serge Gainsbourg) arrives to arrest Lord James, James flees to hide in the castle cellar. The viewer continues to believe that James is the murderer, but the final sequence of the film reveals who is really behind the MacGrief family murders, and the stained glass lamp makes another appearance that ties to the opening of the film.


Seven Deaths In A Cat's Eye has some plot elements very similar to Agatha Christie's 1939 novel – Ten Little Indians. One of many interesting aspects of Seven Deaths In A Cat's Eyes is the ambiguity of the time period in which the film takes place. Clothing worn by actors and interior décor in filmed environments suggests that we are seeing a late Victorian era set piece. However, actress Jane Birkin wears a number of outfits that look as if we are in a 1920s Scottish environment. A reference to the famous writings of Sigmund Freud is also mentioned in one scene – which suggests that the film takes place in the early 20th century. The opening horse and carriage scene suggests that this is a time before the automobile.


Director Antonio Margheriti directed a number of 1960s horror thriller films that were not quite as stylish and effective as Seven Deaths In A Cat's Eyes – such as Castle of Blood (1964) and Long Hair of Death (1964), both starring raven haired beauty Barbara Steele. Margheriti also directed a number of Italian “sword & sandal” epics – such as Hercules, Prisoner of Evil and Giants of Rome, both in 1964. Happy viewing.


Sunday, February 20, 2022

The Brain That Wouldn't Die -- a sleazy search for the perfect body



By Steve D. Stones

The first question I always ask myself every time I watch this drive-in schlock masterpiece from 1959 is: “Would any man want a girlfriend with a sewn-on head?”

It’s such a simple question with a simple answer, yet the main character in "The Brain That Wouldn't Die," played by Jason “Herb” Evers, is determined to keep Jan Compton (Virginia Leith), his fiancé’s head alive after it is severed from her body in a terrible car crash.

Evers spends most of the film desperately looking for a beautiful young body to attach to his fiancé’s head. He hangs out at bathing beauty contests and a figure model class drooling over curvy cuties to replace his fiancé’s body. He finds just the right body of a brunette named Doris (Adele Lamont) at the figure model class. She conveniently has deep scars on her face, but her body is to die for (no pun intended).



As for me, if I lost my girlfriend in a car accident, instead of keeping her head alive, I think I would be looking for a new girlfriend. Why go through the trouble of looking for a new body when you can just find the entire package, right? This is a large part of the unintentional humor of the film. What’s even funnier is when the severed head argues with the lab assistant as to whether or not it is right and ethical for them to be keeping her alive. Why be half dead when you can die a full death?

Perhaps the film is trying to make a statement about unconditional, unyielding love? Evers loves his fiancé deeply, and the loss of her body is not going to change his love for her. Even if it means he has to commit murder to keep her alive.

The film has many of the clichés in horror films that we’ve all come to identify. A monster is kept locked away in a closet and patched together by a mad doctor, much like Frankenstein’s monster. A loyal, yet deformed laboratory assistant stands by the mad doctor, despite his fear of the monster in the closet and his determination to suggest that their experiments are ethically wrong. The mad doctor is a playboy at heart who may love his fiancé, but deep down has a lust for other women too. We’ve seen this formula before.



Although The Brain That Wouldn’t Die began production in 1959, it was not released until 1962. The ending of the film shows the title as: The Head That Wouldn’t Die. It is the first film that I’m aware of that brings graphic violence to the screen, even pre-dating Herschell Gordon Lewis’ graphically violent Blood Feast.

The lab assistant has his right arm torn off by the monster in the closet. He drags the right side of his body up against the lab walls, smearing blood everywhere. The monster bites off a large section of Herb Evers’ neck, and then spits it on the lab floor as the camera zooms in on it closely. This was graphic stuff for the early 1960s. Television prints of the film had to cut out these two scenes in order to be able to show the film on TV.


One unique aspect of the film is its unconventional ending. Normally the good-looking guy, in this case the mad doctor played by Evers, gets the girl and a happy ending occurs. In The Brain That Wouldn’t Die, it’s the monster that gets away with the girl, while the handsome man lies bleeding and dying in his laboratory. This is a bit more original than most conventional low-budget horror films.

If you ever find yourself in the same situation as the mad doctor in this film, I think it would be best just to go out and find yourself a new girlfriend. After all, why go through the trouble of sawing off the head of another woman just to use the body for your girlfriend’s head? Nature didn’t intend for heads to be replaced with different bodies, so why waste your time improving on nature? This is what makes the plot of The Brain That Wouldn’t Die so absurd, yet fun to watch. Keep the popcorn close by.

(This film can be viewed for free on Tubi, Amazon Prime, and other locations, including YouTube.

Sunday, February 13, 2022

Future Stooge Joe DeRita in Wedlock Deadlock, a Columbia comedy short from 1947

 


Review by Doug Gibson

There's a scene in the Columbia comedy short, "Wedlock Deadlock," that contains the kind of studio in-humor that makes me love these semi-vintage comedies. Star Joe DeRita, frustrated beyond sensible patience by obnoxious, cloddish in laws who won't leave, is holding a book titled "Nearly Perfect Murders." The author's name is Elwood Ullman.




The scores of thousands of movie-goers who saw this short for the next few years in various theaters likely had no idea who Ullman was. He was the screenwriter for "Wedlock Deadlock." It was an inside joke for the Columbia team, likely hatched from director Edward Bernds, who directed many above-par Columbia shorts for Hugh McCollum's department. 

You can watch "Wedlock Deadlock" here, via YouTube. Greg Hilbrich, who runs the absolutely essential The Columbia Short Department website, showed me links to all four Columbia comedies DeRita starred in during the second half of the 1940s. "Wedlock Deadlock" was my favorite; all are more or less remakes of previous Columbia shorts for other stars. DeRita with a full head of hair kind of resembles Lou Costello a little. But he lacks Costello's wit, although he's' not bad in physical comedy. He was mostly cast as a harried husband. (More on The Columbia Shorts Department at the end of this post)

In "Wedding Wedlock," shlubbish DeRita is "Eddie,' improbably maried to gorgeous blonde, Betty, played by Christine McIntyre (probably the most iconic Columbia female star; she was in dozens of shorts but is best known for her supporting work with the Three Stooges). The pair are in their new home, all lovey-dovey, when ... her family arrives uninvited.

They are mother-in-law, Lydia, sister-in-law Hortense, and brother-in-law Chester. They are rude, pathologically insensitive freeloaders who take over the house, to Eddie's outrage and Betty's mild protests. There are slapstick comedy scenes. DeRita serves dinner and is not able to get a bite. Another scene involves the trio rearranging the furniture and a fight over a radio in the home. Eddie's eventually ready to go after the in-laws with a meat cleaver but  relents after Betty's pleas for patience. Nevertheless, the in-laws take over the bedroom, forcing the newlyweds to sleep on chairs and tables in the living room. More slapstick ensues as DeRita's makeshift bed collapses.

Eventually, Eddie arranges to have his friend, Dick, and his wife Ruby, come visit the house. The goal is to give the rude Lydia, Hortense and Chester a taste of their own medicine. The final few minutes of the short is very funny. I don't want to give the ending away but I will mention that Dorothy Granger, who plays Ruby, more or less steals the film with her enthusiastic, manic, funny performance. I am aware of Granger, who included Columbia in her roughly 250-film career of minor roles, uncredited bit parts and TV roles. She really steals the show from DeRita, who grumbles more than he fights. Also, McIntyre, who has a history of playing -- energetically -- a heroine, a villain, and a comic in many Columbia shorts, is also quite passive in this short.

The slapstick comedy fell a little to DeRita, but more so to comedy shorts veterans Esther Howard (Lydia), Patsy Moran (Hortense) and Charles Williams (Chester). They are obnoxious but do an adequate job carrying physical comedy. William Newall, as Dick, also is adequate. As mentioned, though, Granger's Ruby is the best slapstick comic presence in this short. 

However, the "ironic tag" ending, that Columbia occasionally used, allows both DeRita and McIntye to show a bit more passion, Columbia "O'Oucho" style, at the very end.

I don't know how ubiquitos "Wedlock Deadlock" was in theaters. Below in old newspaper clippings from The Anniston (Ala) Star (Dec. 21, 1947) you see it mentioned as a short with George O'Brien's "Wings Over Wyoming," and there's a paragraph noting that "J DeRita" is the star. Below the Star is a Feb. 24, 1949, Statesville (Tex) Daily-Record clip showing the film as the comedy short with Johnny Mack Brown's "The Fighting Ranger." That bill also includes a supporting feature and a cartoon.







According to Wikipedia, DeRita was not happy with his Columbia shorts. Maybe that's why only four were produced. The former burlesque and Los Angeles stage star doesn't project great screen presence. He does do physical comedy fairly well. Two other shorts, "Slappily Married," and "The Good Bad Egg,' show off his skills. But I prefer him in an understated, suffering "everyman" role like "Wedlock Deadlock."

I really appreciate all Hilbrich has done gathering and preserving the entire Columbia shorts output. Without genre experts like him we would miss a lot of the great shorts. 

Afternote: I recently acquired copies of nearly two dozen non-Three Stooges Columbia comedy shorts. Greg Hilbrich, who manages the invaluable website The Columbia Shorts Department offers many of the comedy shorts, including titles other than Columbia, for sale via DVD and digital download.Sales of these non-Stooges shorts provided the opportunity to view vintage comedy shorts that are out of circulation.