Robot Monster - A Great 'Bad' Movie

By Steve D. Stones

Just how bad is Robot Monster (aka Monster From Mars - 1953)? If you consider that the entire story of the film is mostly from the point of view of a child's dream, it's really not that bad of a movie. Reviews of the film were so bad that director Phil Tucker is said to have attempted suicide. The Elmer Bernstein score eventually gets as annoying and redundant as the score by Hoyt Curtain for Ed Wood's "Jail Bait (1953)" - another great "bad movie."

Little Johnny enters a cave to play spaceman with his younger sister when he encounters two archaeologists looking for evidence of a past civilization. The two archaeologists are invited to a picnic by Johnny's mother and sister.

After waking from a short sleep during the picnic, Johnny discovers that one of the archaeologists is now his father - a man old enough to be his great-grandfather, and that the world has been wiped out by a Ro-Man - an alien in a silly gorilla suit with a diver's helmet and TV antenna on top.  Ro-Man hides in the same cave where the two archaeologists were conducting their search at the beginning of the film. He keeps communication with his leader from another planet on a cheap looking television transmission set.

It turns out that Johnny and his family are the only survivors of Ro-man's annihilation - which is a total of six people. Ro-man's leader orders him to destroy the remaining six with a "calcinator ray," but he can't seem to get it right. He constantly fiddles with his communication device in the cave as he threatens the family. He even watches stock footage of dinosaurs fighting - a scene likely appropriated from the 1925 silent film - The Lost World.

The family discovers a serum that protects them from Ro-man's death ray. Little Johnny is the first to survive with the serum after he encounters Ro-man and calls him a "pooped out pin wheel." This has to be one of the funniest scenes in the film, next to Ro-man trying to make a date with Johnny's older sister - Alice.

Rhino Video issued a VHS 3-D print of Robot Monster with two 3-D glasses in the early 1990s. This print is difficult to watch because the 3-D treatment of the film actually does not work.  A 3-D print of Cat Women of The Moon (1953) was also issued by Rhino Video with just as poor results.

Wearing the 3-D glasses for either film simply does not work. However, for the serious collector of B-movies, like myself, it is still fun to have the VHS copy of both Robot Monster and Cat Women of The Moon with the glasses.  The artwork on the box of both videos is worth the price of admission. Happy viewing!

Cat-Women of The Moon

CAT-WOMEN OF THE MOON: Curvy Cuties In Black Tights

By Steve D. Stones

Here is another film that ranks in the top five “worst movies of all
time” according to most reputable film critics. Like Robot Monster, this
film was released in some theaters as a 3-D film in the early 1950s.
Rhino Home Video released a VHS print of the film in the mid-1990s
containing two pairs of 3-D glasses. The 3-D effect is ineffective, but
as a collector, it’s a real treat to have the glasses as a part of your
video collection.

A space expedition on board Moon Rocket 4 is sent to explore the surface
of the moon. Pretty navigator Helen, played by Marie Windsor, is
experiencing telepathic messages from a group of cat women from the
moon’s surface. The cat women inform Helen where to land on the moon.
She instructs the crew, lead by veteran actor Sonny Tufts, to land on a
specific spot near some caverns. There the crew encounters a cheesy
giant rubber spider, which is seen in many low budget 1950s sci-fi
movies.

Helen leads the crew to an ancient underground moon civilization
inhabited by cat women dressed in black tights. According to the opening
credits, the cat women are played by the Hollywood Cover Girls. Each one
is named after a letter in the Greek alphabet, such as Alpha, Zeta and
Lamda. Apparently the Ancient Greeks were capable of space travel and
somehow made their way to the moon to influence the culture of the cat
women. I thought space travel didn’t happen until the mid-20th century?
Guess I was wrong.



The cat women are hospitable towards the crew and take an immediate
liking to the three male members. Little do the men realize that the
women are trying to obtain information from them on how to operate the
rocket ship so they can leave their dying civilization. They have no
desire to mate with the men, but only to obtain information from them.

It’s interesting to note that this film was remade at least three times
during the 1950s as Missile To The Moon, Fire Maidens of Outer Space and
the notoriously awful Queen of Outer Space with Zsa Zsa Gabor. Why
anyone would want to remake a turkey like this is anyone’s guess, but
fans of low-budget, grade Z movies, like myself, love seeing attempts at
remakes. Composer Elmer Bernstein created the music for this film and
Robot Monster. Special effects veterans Al Zimbalist and Jack Rabin are
also credited. Don’t miss the tacky cat women dance about half way into
the film. It’s well worth the price of admission!